So on my spiritual journey/fast...I've encountered some praiseworthy findings.
One of them being that I'm really grumpy/tired/ full of BS when I don't eat for more than ten hours lol.
Secondly, I find myself starving...chasing almost affection. There's a difference between Affection and attention though...I had to clearly define them too.
Attention is wanting to be heard...seen...recognized as being you.
Affection the feeling of sensuality platonic and non, as being wholesome in nature to your counterparts.
But, through all of this discovery, i still end up nil. I try talking more...engaging more...even appeasing my mom to see if I can squeeze some outta her ---> NIENTE!
So, as I go through this journey, I am starving for this affection that only one person I THOUGHT would be able to quench....#negative.
But I started reading this book "Good to Me" and it's a very Christian-Like spiritual book, with a Hint of Zane lol. The main Character, Charity "Cherry" Phillips, had a hard knock life. She's been hoping that God would fix her divorced marriage of 3 years, because as a Christian she believes that divorce isn't favorable, especially when kids are involved.
Therefore, she breaks down and cries as to why this love she has for her ex Emmitt, would build back and get fixed....but then she said a line that she quoted from the bible that spoke to me on every level possible! ---> Jesus is my husband, and that is more than enough for me today!
WOW!! THE RAY OF LIGHT SHOT THRU THE THICKNESS OF THE STORM....
There is one person that would be therefore me night and day...in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer. Jesus. Why starve for affection when there is someone who loves me more than I can ever ask? He's that homeboy that never goes home like Roger...he won't stop until he know's you rest easy.
I know at one point, I'll receive that love and affection from another person who embodies all the qualities I love the most, but for right now I AM more than content because Jesus got my back :)
I feel as if my heart has so much devotion and courage, and strenght, and willingness to sacrifice and understanding and one day I want to share that with someone close to me, if not my boyfriend/husband, then my children..."My heart big but IT beat silent". But, I am sure Jesus got someone lined up for me. LIKE A GOOD HOMEBOY, JESUS IS THERE!
Shoutout to JESUS :)
One of them being that I'm really grumpy/tired/ full of BS when I don't eat for more than ten hours lol.
Secondly, I find myself starving...chasing almost affection. There's a difference between Affection and attention though...I had to clearly define them too.
Attention is wanting to be heard...seen...recognized as being you.
Affection the feeling of sensuality platonic and non, as being wholesome in nature to your counterparts.
But, through all of this discovery, i still end up nil. I try talking more...engaging more...even appeasing my mom to see if I can squeeze some outta her ---> NIENTE!
So, as I go through this journey, I am starving for this affection that only one person I THOUGHT would be able to quench....#negative.
But I started reading this book "Good to Me" and it's a very Christian-Like spiritual book, with a Hint of Zane lol. The main Character, Charity "Cherry" Phillips, had a hard knock life. She's been hoping that God would fix her divorced marriage of 3 years, because as a Christian she believes that divorce isn't favorable, especially when kids are involved.
Therefore, she breaks down and cries as to why this love she has for her ex Emmitt, would build back and get fixed....but then she said a line that she quoted from the bible that spoke to me on every level possible! ---> Jesus is my husband, and that is more than enough for me today!
WOW!! THE RAY OF LIGHT SHOT THRU THE THICKNESS OF THE STORM....
There is one person that would be therefore me night and day...in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer. Jesus. Why starve for affection when there is someone who loves me more than I can ever ask? He's that homeboy that never goes home like Roger...he won't stop until he know's you rest easy.
I feel as if my heart has so much devotion and courage, and strenght, and willingness to sacrifice and understanding and one day I want to share that with someone close to me, if not my boyfriend/husband, then my children..."My heart big but IT beat silent". But, I am sure Jesus got someone lined up for me. LIKE A GOOD HOMEBOY, JESUS IS THERE!
Shoutout to JESUS :)
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