Why is it I am so conflicted?

I really never noticed how are it is being me.
Well, let me re-phrase that, I never noticed how hard it is being US.
Us meaning, me one being with three separately abilities to conquer one mind.
It obviously makes no sense to you, but in time IT WILL.
You see, I wake up everyone morning as person Chardline the sister.
I pay mortgages, I make breakfast, I watch my nephew, I try to blend with family picture, but even that's hard.
I don't have their sense of "sensibility" nor do I have their sense of "instability"
Coming home to house full of almost strangers it feels like and my only sanity is my cat (go figures). Love does
manifest itself in many ways, shapes and sizes but this love IDK it's a bit of a battle. Chardline the "sister/daughter/aunt/whomever I am to all the strangers in the home". EXHAUSTED.

Then there is Chardline the "overly academic , hard work driven individual"
I pretty much go to school and work everyday after being Chardline the "sister/daughter/aunt/whomever I am to all the strangers in the home."
This Chardline I have learned to love because I am showing room for personal growth and improvement that many of my co-workers (and ultimately the boss).
That's a mouthful, but unfortunately, I am always reminded that I am still Chardline the "sister/daughter/aunt/whomever I am to all the strangers in the home."
That's not something you can forget over night. It's only unfortunate because I don't know if I belong there.

Then lastly there is Chardline "whom is still finding herself." Life is an great journey that I don't plan on giving it up...or taking a way out. Time is too precious and relationships are being broken and mended everyday. I guess I am the most comfortable in my "IDK WHO I AM YET, BUT I WILL LET YOU KNOW" me. I like it, in fact I have to try and love it. After all, who else is gunner love it.

I guess I can continue embracing all three Chardline's in one. But sooner or later I'm going to have to choose.

Keep Reading...it can only get better from here on out, Chardline the sister/daughter/aunt/whomever I am to all the strangers in the home +++overly academic , hard work driven individual" +++++IDK WHO I AM YET, BUT I WILL LET YOU KNOW"